Over the next four Mondays before Christmas, I will be writing some small letters to Santa. In each letter I will express my gratitude, and make my wishes known. Here is my first letter, a big one from the heart:

P.S. no promotional links provided during these thank yous.

Bless You, MENTORSDear Santa,

I’m not sure where to begin this year. So much has happened; so many blessings. Let me begin with gratitude and say thanks for what have been my blessings. First let me give thanks to those who have been my mentors, people who guided me, sometimes not so gently, but always with compassion and concern that I become the best I can be. I am a continuing work in progress but there are people to whom I owe much:

Mary Deal, award-winning and bestselling author, award-winning photographer and painter, editor and explorer. I met her online in 1997 and she’s been a guidepost and an inspiration ever since. She helped me expand my poetry, and to find deeper meanings in my words. She led me into new light. She believed in me.

Judy Mallow-Gripton, author, editor, teacher and so much more. She taught me the difference between AP and CS. Served me well and I got jobs because of this understanding. She taught me how to do serial fiction. She gave me my first serialized column (lessons on poetry) and turned me into an editor.

Joel Friedlander, the man who knows a bit of everything about the publishing business. Right now I’m speaking about book covers: what defines a genre, what colors are taboo, all about fonts and readability. The list is endless. He is the god among the designers for me. And speaking of designers:   Sean Foley, Travis Miles, Robin Johnson, and Marisa-rose Wesley, my cover designers should be rewarded. Each taught me something about designing and covers and style. I’m learning more every day but these people put me on the path. As a result, my collaboration with these designers and their incredible talent, has brought numerous awards. Be good to them, Santa.

Interiors are important to books, too. Until recently, I didn’t know what creative book interiors looked like or even that they existed. Thank you Cassy Roop! And she patiently corrects me, explains concepts and teaches me with every new book she formats. These too, win awards. And I continue to be a student.

Teachers of the business are everywhere but a few others whispered in my ear, without mockery. I am filled with appreciation every day for those who came with me at the beginning. They have moved well beyond me, yet they never look down at me. And when I needed friends or advice, or a shoulder, they were there. This goes out to the #FLINKS: Robbie Cox, Margie Miklas, Taylor Fulks, Pam L’Heureux, Jackie Birdsong, Ginger Myrick, Lidia Doweyko, and Stephanie Michele.  Other strong voices in the dark include Elaine Calloway, Sarah Olsen, Terri Wilson, and Patricia Terrell.

People who can push you to do more than you might have dared because they believe that what you do matters, are rare. This mentor did that for me, fully realizing what the leap of faith meant. She taught me to dare to speak my truth. I did and I’ve never regretted it. Rachel Thompson. Be especially kind to her, Santa. The scars never truly heal. And to Sharon Jones Frizzell,  who knew me at my worst and never doubted I had “a better” in me. The lessons I learned from her helped me become the writer I am.

Retired Colonel (USAF) Stanley G. Maratos gave me three lessons for life. I’ve never forgotten them, have passed them to many and he probably has no idea how much his wisdom changed my life for the better. He’s over 80 years now and Santa, be kind to him for me. I give you his lessons now: 1. Fortune favors the bold. 2. Never trouble trouble. 3. Let right be done, no matter what.

Now for some mentors who died, yet their impact stays with me always:  Mrs. Dorothy Wise, English Teacher – she taught me about the depth of words and pushed my poetry. Mrs. Dolores Jean Ellis, choir teacher and friend who sat with me on tour one night and changed my life as we talked about love and the power of heart. And when I needed a coach for a competition while overseas, she delivered without question (and it was 6 years since I had seen her). And Mr. Roger Bishop, a civil servant who was as much a father to me as my own when it came to advise and support. He believed in my upcoming marriage to my husband when few did and he was quick to tell me how to live better.

Those are the mentors, Santa. I have friends and collegues who I will write you about but today my wish for them is health, joy, and success. May they have blessings to fill their lives for the kindness and impact they gave to my life. I am grateful for these people, every single day. I hope others bless their mentors and let them know how appreciated they are, too.

Another letter next week, Santa. Thank you. Merry Christmas to you and yours,

I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

Finding Gratitude from Nothing

Thanksgiving came and went this year and the holiday was a blessedly peaceful, safe, and healthy one for me. I counted my numerous blessings, ate a delicious meal and enjoyed an after dinner drink and a movie. My husband and I escaped the discussions of dreadful politics and instead we focused on family and our good life. We were (and are) grateful for what we have and cherish our good fortunes.

Gratitude. It’s so easy to feel blessed when living in abundance. It is easy to mouth about your good fortune when you have a mouth full of turkey and dressing. When you are warm by the fire in your snuggly robe and slippers enjoying a glass of fine wine and in the company of family, it is easy to feel happy. That’s why I don’t think that gratitude has as much meaning when the cup runneth over as it does when the cup is bone dry.

The fires in California provided a myriad of lessons in gratitude, or lack of it. Imagine running for your life through the flames, with nothing except the clothes on your back? And imagine your home, your town, your car, your friends – everything and everyone – perishing in the blink of a flame. Totally gone. Everything turned to gray ash. No home, no neighbors, no car, no souvenirs, no anything. You literally have nothing. How glibly those of us not there say, “well you’re alive.” And imagine the 70 yr old man who lost the only home he’d ever known, his wife, his dog, his car, his home and all his memories. And imagine how he turned to the camera and smiled and asked how he could help the firefighters. He had gratitude and wanted to share it. It was more than just “being alive.” He was genuinely thankful for his life, and those in it. He had no expectations so everything – every little thing including breathing – was a miracle for which he was grateful.

How many times have you said “thanks” out of habit or because it was expected? Do you say it when it isn’t expected? Do you express your satisfaction when there is no expectation for it? Can you say with a whole heart that you give and show gratitude and appreciation when you don’t have to or aren’t on display? Do you openly give thanks to others? Can you say that you know how to express gratitude?

This is the heart of gratitude. Feeling it when there is no obvious reason or benefit for it. To be able to say, “thank you” for a crumb instead of a whole sandwich. For having nothing but the clothes on your back and air to breathe. And to say your thanks without tearful regret, shame or other negative emotions, without wondering if you’re doing what’s expected but knowing you’re expression comes from a private place in your heart.

Gratitude is the first step to finding real happiness. To recognize and express gratitude for the smallest, the meanest, the most inconsequential is as important as recognizing your abundance, your overt blessings. When you are able to express gratitude for nothing and feel joy in that expression, then you understand the truth of finding true happiness.

So how is it done? How do you find gratitude when the car blew up and the kids are sick and bills are overdue and you’ve just been fired, when the fires take everything, when you parent dies and your divorce is final? Where is the gratitude when life hands you a big ball of….crap?

You stop expecting anything. It’s our expectations that get us into trouble. We aren’t due anything so expect nothing and everything will become a miracle blessing. Stop whining and complaining long enough to see something good in what you do have. One good thing always leads to discovering more good things. And that’s how you find abundance. Even in poverty and despair. And abundance brings on more gratitude. See?

We aren’t born knowing this emotion. We have to learn to share. So it follows that we have to learn to be grateful when we are given and stop expecting things to be our due. Once we learn the lessons that comes from gratitude, counting our blessings becomes easier to do every day.

Like the old man from Paradise who literally lost everything. His hands are empty. His world is gone. His love is dead. But, as he sees it, he still has everything. That’s a lot to be grateful for.

How about you? Give it a try. And….

As always, I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

Welcome to the Midpoint National Novel Writing Month

A personal letter to every participating WriMo,

3…2…1…you lifted off on 1 Nov 2018 for a writing journey that is unlike any other. First time doing the National Novel Writing Month? Feeling a little lost? Long time writer but wondering, “now what?” As you stare at your journal or computer….

Imagine what it was like for the first Apollo astronauts on their way to the moon. How exciting the liftoff was, how nervous they were with all the hype, how there was so much to do in the beginning and then —

Then they managed to get halfway to the moon, and it was dark and cold and the excitement was there but doubts and worry snuck into their dreams. What were they doing? How did they think they could do this amazing thing? What if they failed? What waited for them when they got to the moon? The questions filled their minds and maybe they were just a little bit afraid of the dark, of the unknown, and even of themselves.

This is how it may go for some writers when they hit the middle of NaNoWriMo–it is dark and cold and unknown. Doubts have set in, excitement has waned and now becomes more work than fun. And there is wonder about what they are doing, if it is even worth it, if the story matters, if they can finish, and so on. It is like being in the great vacuum of space, dark and cold.

I’m here to tell you that the mid-point of the month is called a lot of things by lots of authors (my favorite is Jim Butcher’s the Great Swampy Middle), but overall it is the same for everyone. Doubts and fear create a bit of nervous uncertainty as the shiny glow of the month wears off. What now, you ask? Here’s a little advice from a WriMo veteran.

   –First, Trust Yourself. You had a plan, even if you are pantsing it. You have tales to tell. So keep telling them.

   –Next, Focus. Don’t deviate from your path. Imagine what would have happened to the space program if the astronauts chickened out? So whether you are in the middle age, middle of the book, middle of a race, keep focused. Otherwise you will veer off course and lose your way like so many before you.

   –Then, Understand. The middle is necessary. Nothing is achieved by starting and finishing without something in the middle. The astronauts probably felt tension and nervousness. They expected it and didn’t fear it. So it must be for you. Let your characters feel this uncertainty but don’t you fear it.

   –Finally, Believe. Don’t make excuses. Don’t look for a way out. The best way is always through according to Robert Frost. Like those astronauts, you need to steer straight ahead. When you believe you can, you will. Eventually the distance to the moon closed and suddenly the astronauts were there and winging their way back home. Climax and ending.

You signed on for a cosmic journey this year, becoming your own astronaut in an adventure of literary and personal exploration. I have every faith that you can succeed. Believe in yourself and your project and you will be splashing back down to Earth in two weeks, beginning with one heck of a tale to tell about your journey. And that tale is one we are all hoping to read.

It all began with 50,000 words.

Today you’re hitting around 20,000 or maybe you’ve done a slingshot around the moon and are cruising at over 25,000. Even if you’re floating at 15,000, great work! I believe you can do it. The astronauts believed and look how far we went: Apollo, Space Shuttle, Space Station. Let this small cold moment in the middle of space be the momentum for your amazing finish! Next stop, Mars!

The midpoint? The name is only a marker. Like saying the cup is half full. We both know you are going to finish now. You’ve come this far, seen the dark side of the moon and now you turn your face to the home. Your Earth. Good luck explorers. I can’t wait to read about your adventures.

Hang on tight! The Earth’s gravity is pulling you back and your trip is almost over. You can do it!

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Next time we meet here, let’s talk turkey…and gratitude. Thank you!

Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry