Finding Gratitude from Nothing

Thanksgiving came and went this year and the holiday was a blessedly peaceful, safe, and healthy one for me. I counted my numerous blessings, ate a delicious meal and enjoyed an after dinner drink and a movie. My husband and I escaped the discussions of dreadful politics and instead we focused on family and our good life. We were (and are) grateful for what we have and cherish our good fortunes.

Gratitude. It’s so easy to feel blessed when living in abundance. It is easy to mouth about your good fortune when you have a mouth full of turkey and dressing. When you are warm by the fire in your snuggly robe and slippers enjoying a glass of fine wine and in the company of family, it is easy to feel happy. That’s why I don’t think that gratitude has as much meaning when the cup runneth over as it does when the cup is bone dry.

The fires in California provided a myriad of lessons in gratitude, or lack of it. Imagine running for your life through the flames, with nothing except the clothes on your back? And imagine your home, your town, your car, your friends – everything and everyone – perishing in the blink of a flame. Totally gone. Everything turned to gray ash. No home, no neighbors, no car, no souvenirs, no anything. You literally have nothing. How glibly those of us not there say, “well you’re alive.” And imagine the 70 yr old man who lost the only home he’d ever known, his wife, his dog, his car, his home and all his memories. And imagine how he turned to the camera and smiled and asked how he could help the firefighters. He had gratitude and wanted to share it. It was more than just “being alive.” He was genuinely thankful for his life, and those in it. He had no expectations so everything – every little thing including breathing – was a miracle for which he was grateful.

How many times have you said “thanks” out of habit or because it was expected? Do you say it when it isn’t expected? Do you express your satisfaction when there is no expectation for it? Can you say with a whole heart that you give and show gratitude and appreciation when you don’t have to or aren’t on display? Do you openly give thanks to others? Can you say that you know how to express gratitude?

This is the heart of gratitude. Feeling it when there is no obvious reason or benefit for it. To be able to say, “thank you” for a crumb instead of a whole sandwich. For having nothing but the clothes on your back and air to breathe. And to say your thanks without tearful regret, shame or other negative emotions, without wondering if you’re doing what’s expected but knowing you’re expression comes from a private place in your heart.

Gratitude is the first step to finding real happiness. To recognize and express gratitude for the smallest, the meanest, the most inconsequential is as important as recognizing your abundance, your overt blessings. When you are able to express gratitude for nothing and feel joy in that expression, then you understand the truth of finding true happiness.

So how is it done? How do you find gratitude when the car blew up and the kids are sick and bills are overdue and you’ve just been fired, when the fires take everything, when you parent dies and your divorce is final? Where is the gratitude when life hands you a big ball of….crap?

You stop expecting anything. It’s our expectations that get us into trouble. We aren’t due anything so expect nothing and everything will become a miracle blessing. Stop whining and complaining long enough to see something good in what you do have. One good thing always leads to discovering more good things. And that’s how you find abundance. Even in poverty and despair. And abundance brings on more gratitude. See?

We aren’t born knowing this emotion. We have to learn to share. So it follows that we have to learn to be grateful when we are given and stop expecting things to be our due. Once we learn the lessons that comes from gratitude, counting our blessings becomes easier to do every day.

Like the old man from Paradise who literally lost everything. His hands are empty. His world is gone. His love is dead. But, as he sees it, he still has everything. That’s a lot to be grateful for.

How about you? Give it a try. And….

As always, I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

Seasonal Changes and Mid-Year Review

The temperature may be 90 degrees outside and the A/C is definitely cranked down inside, but there are signs everything is about to switch over to a new season. I’m ready, are you?

(my house and I know we aren’t there yet, but hey…!)

When I was at the grocery store a few days ago, the magazines are touting “soups to warm you” and “easy casseroles for tailgating,” and snuggly quilts to make for those chilly nights. Covers display autumnal designs with pumpkins and warm colors of gold and orange. Domestic magazines are encouraging us to take our families on the ghost tours. In other words, Summer may have us firmly in her grasp but Autumn is pacing in the wings and she’s not far away.

Which is why I thought now was a good time to catch up with a mid-year review with what’s news and include what’s happened to be sure we’re ready for a change season.

UPCOMING NEW RELEASE: First, the July newsletter gave subscribers a first look at the new book cover! I followed this up with a release on Facebook, first on the Cover Me Darlings page and then on mine. Now you get to see the final front cover:

I’m completely crazed for this divine cover by Marisa-rose Wesley of Cover Me Darlings. The upcoming events are wonderfully captured. Hoping to for a SEP 21 RELEASE. No pre-order info yet.  If you want to be ready for the new book, then begin with the prequel, THE GYPSY THORN. Here’s a teaser and a link.
LATEST CHAT: I’ve done a Live Chat every month. Hope you’ve been listening. The latest one promised exclusive content for newsletter subscribers. August will begin those surprises. Catch up on the latest video here.  Newsletter subscribers can sign up here.

INSTAGRAM: Are you following all the pens I’ve been showing every Monday on Instagram? Here is the one for this week — you’re seeing it here the same time I’m posting on IG. Only two left after today. What a cool year of pens it has been. You can always scroll back through my IG and revisit them.

UPCOMING EVENT:  Find me next at Book ‘Em North Carolina, an author signing designed to fight against illiteracy. This will be my third time with them. The event is Sep 22, Robeson Community College, NC and the event is FREE. All you pay for are the books you buy. There are about 35 authors and publishers scheduled to attend. Plus there will be some panels and those are free too. Hope to see you. Here is the website with more info. Come by and mention this blog post and you’ll get a little something extra with my compliments.

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ON THE HORIZON: I was given a great idea and I am going to implement it right away. The suggestion was that I do some specialized videos about each of the books in my Evening Bower series, to include information about the characters plus read a snippet from each book. 

I like that idea and so I will begin this information right away! The first video will appear soon and be about Midnight Assassin. The second will be at the end of August and cover The Gypsy Thorn. The third will be about Time and Blood and appear around mid September. In the vids I will introduce you to characters, give you information about the plot and read something from the book. I will mention particulars about the characters that may enhance your experience with the story.

All this will be in preparation of the newest book’s release. Just before it comes out, I will do a teaser video (TBA) and mention some secrets that have never been discussed. Sound like fun?

Exact dates TBA in the newsletter, in here, and on my Facebook Author page. It’ll be FUN!

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There’s MORE!  FAN FICTION WRITERS!

My special book, Vampire Vignettes is planned for late spring 2019 (guessing). This book will be scenes that never made it into the regular novels of the Evening Bower. I have planned scenes between Drahomira and Franklin, Destin and Reaper, Rhea and Cooke…and so many more. But here’s where YOU come in.

I’m going to offer readers of the series a chance to have their fan fiction vignette INCLUDED in this book. You won’t be paid royalties when published, but you will have your own chapter in the back under Fan Fiction and you’ll be a published author too! Thinking right now up to three stories. More info on this coming.

If you have read the novels and plan to read the new book, then you will have all the information you need to do a fun vignette (of course I will happily answer any questions). Lighthearted is the key. They may be dark but they have to have some quirk to make me smile and must capture the established flavor and voice of the character. Look for specifics by the end of the month. I’m VERY excited about this and look forward to helping you out too.

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With the upcoming change of season, I’m changing too. I love the longer nights and the darker shadows.  New books keep me excited and the prospects ahead are as moonlight from a full moon. The changes make me want to write more….more….more!

Thank you for stopping by. Watch my newsletter and Facebook author page for updates, and of course, the Monday posts here. 

I remain always, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

WHY WE MEMORIALIZE TODAY

Today is Memorial Day. For some, it will be just another holiday that includes swimming, picnics, grilling in the backyard, sports binging, or a lazy day with a cold drink and a good book.

Whatever your activity this year, please take a moment and reflect on the reason why you have the freedom to do as you please.

Today, we remember the men and women who sacrificed their lives in the military service of their country. Today, their shadow falls over us and protects us from the vilest forms of oppression, injustice, and slavery. Their deaths mean we live free.

I understand we are a suffering people. And socially, we have much to learn and need many adjustments to find better days. But the shadow I speak of allows you the ability to complain about a leader without going to jail. It allows you to wake up without having to put on a gas mask and sling a weapon on your shoulder before going outside. The shadow of spilt blood allows you to worship where you wish and with whom you wish. The shadow of many men and women are the security blanket to the life we live in this country, and with the greatest amount of protections and freedoms than enjoyed anywhere else in the world.

Wars were fought all over the world. Men died in the jungles, in the sands, in the streets, on the oceans and in the air, against many kinds of aggressors. And forgetting our political beliefs for the reason soldiers were deployed there, the point is they stayed and they fought and they were valiant and they died believing in one simple truth — that we, and this country, were worth it.

No, I’m not going to be naïve and say that we don’t have issues in this country. There are home grown and international terrorists who lurk in the very shadows that rest over us. We have “leadership” with questionable moral fiber and a systemic national misogyny thankfully but slowly going up in smoke under the #MeToo movement. We have African American, Hispanic, Asian and Native American people who are fighting prejudice and wrongful deaths as well as cultural persecution. We have gangs and drugs and legal fighting over abortions and border walls and immigration.

We are not perfect.

Some would say certain among us aren’t truly free.

I say they are wrong. I’ve been to other countries and I’ve seen what happens to those who speak out, who step out of line, who dare to use the freedoms that Americans have and they don’t. I know the jails where the lead paint peels from walls, where the dirt floor hides the scorpion skeletons, and the threat of death is real in a worship-our-way-or-die country. The other side of the fence isn’t greener. It’s swampy and stinks and is filled with smothering terrorism, cultural and societal fetters, chains that will force people into a daily life on its knees.

We are not them.

So while you watch sports and debate with your family over whether or not to take a knee, if you think that teachers (the hardest working advocates for our children) should not get a pay raise, if you argue about feminism (not really understanding what it is), or why English and American Anglicans are not the same, then do so with an appreciation and a respect that your freedom to complain and debate allows to you.

Then be grateful for and protective of that freedom. You can say what you like (as long as it is respectful and appropriate to the situation), you can own a gun, you can watch whatever silly news media you like and read whatever book you wish. You can take pictures of your trip or write a blog and complain. You can file a lawsuit or be a man and marry your male lover. You can go to the pool or the bowling alley, or skating rink or whatever kind of parade you want, and you can check out a movie, eat meat or fish or drink alcohol or clean water. You can be a woman and shoot a gun or be a man and mother and father children.

You are free. And you are because of the continued sacrifices by the brave men and women in the military who died so you could freely complain about how miserable your life is. Please take a moment to enter the military section of your local graveyard and give a moment of silent respect to the fallen. Most of them died willingly for the only thing they clearly understood. that is freedom over tyranny. Each and every one of our fallen made us “the land of the free and the home of the brave.” Let us cherish that which they died to provide.

Have a safe Memorial Day and God Bless America.

Proud to be a non-combat veteran, I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry