THE LEGACY OF TRADITIONS

As I prepared for Christmas this year, I went through my usual, annual habits and realized some of my habits were in fact greater than such a trivial label.  Many of my habits are actual  traditions, made so not by me but from a long list of women who prepared for hundreds of Christmases before me.

I guess my realization began as I gathered the tablecloths from the bottom drawer of the sideboard. In the bottom, lovingly folded, the white tablecloths with candy canes, cookies, and Santa stockings were waiting for their annual viewing.  I inherited these tablecloths from my mother who got them from my paternal grandmother, who received one of them from my great-grandmother.  I removed these cloths and as I passed my fingers over the well-worn pattern, I realized that I was standing, walking, and working in the shadow of a great Christmas tradition – the ritual unpacking and ironing of the cherished linens.

    From 2009

How many times had I seen my grandmothers and mother stand beside the ironing board and watch the back-and-forth motion accompanied with the “sssshhhhh” of steam rising from the freshly washed, pristine cloths?  How often did I marvel at their patience as they performed this ritual ironing, wondering why on earth would they bother (you know teenagers and their lack of “big picture” living)?  How often did my mother send me to the kitchen to refill the little spray bottle with cool water, used to dampen the heavy cotton cloths and eliminate wrinkles?  I even have a memory of a great “thud” of a true cast iron as my grandmother labored over very old, thick, cotton tablecloths with an oven-heated iron. Talk about arm muscles!

  This year

As I pulled out my ironing board, all these memories and thoughts rushed back. I had a small, self-satisfied moment as I realized now I was a part of a wondrous past, a line of great women who continued a truly satisfying tradition of Christmas linens.  I need not ask “why go through all that ironing” as I look at my dining room or kitchen table.  I can’t help but smile, proudly I admit, as I spot the Christmas table cloths with candy canes and Christmas stockings draped over sofa tables or the sideboard. There is a Christmas magic of which I am now a part, as woven as I am into this tapestry of tradition.

Need you ask why a woman who never irons at any other time of the year, irons once a year for Christmas? Call it part of the decorations?  Sure.  But it is so much more to me now.

This is the legacy of traditions. Like the corn soufflé served over certain holidays but only once a year. Like serving ham on New Year’s Day, turkey on Thanksgiving,  or goose for Christmas. Like red, white, and blue decorations for Fourth of July but only that day. These are the things we expect, demand and rely upon as legacy and heritage. Whatever we grew up with or adopted and continue throughout our lives, these matter. These actions and items are comforting and fulfilling because they are part of our “life identity.”

Just like I must have chocolate chip cookies that include a box of Jell-O Pudding to keep the cookies soft, and I must bake these just before Christmas. As I turn on my mixer, I am transported to an older kitchen where other women mixed a batter just like mine and turned out chocolate chip cookies as I will do, to the delight of the house. Habit? Tradition? Legacy.

As an author, this legacy of tradition matters in your writing too. Each book in a series builds on a legacy. The familiar habits of your characters, the places they go regularly. The friendships they develop and the depth of each relationship changes and is enriched in ever chapter, in every book. Every story revisit is a chance to use the traditions and the legacies that you give your readers. And like things we do for ourselves over holidays (even birthdays), so the readers feel taken into your family of stories when you surround them with traditions which completes legacies and legends.

Build these traditions from the beginning in your stories and when you can, repeat them as your stories continue. Pay attention to your real life legacy of traditions and as you enjoy the habits of the season, remember you can give your readers the same joy. Whether you mirror, mimic or create new ideas for your characters and their lives, remember the legacy you leave in your stories can be as real to your readers as your enjoyments are to you.

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ANNOUNCEMENT:  Be sure to join me in my monthly Facebook Live chat on Thursday, Dec 21 at 10 am EST. And come back to Facebook later in the day for a BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION FOR DRAHOMIRA – she’s turning 1000 (well, actually 1020 but we’re keeping to the stories). And she’s got a surprise for you which I will tell you about during my chat!

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I wish each of you a very Merry Christmas and a joyous New Year. I won’t have a blog post for you on Christmas day but I will have a Year in Review post to celebrate the opening of 2018. Come back then and share tales of your Christmas with me.

Here’s to Auld Lang Syne, a song that means “for the sake of old times” and reminds us to cherish old friendships, good health and to toast the new year. Here’s to you! See you next year and thank you for joining me this year as we all strive to be the best we can be.

I remain, 

Separate “Being” from “Doing”

There is so much chaos and violence in the world today. I’m with you on how perplexing it is to see good-hearted people turning on neighbors, to see normally kind children suddenly killing peers, or older adults planning to bomb buildings because a spouse was unfaithful. The world seems quite mad sometimes. And when you add politics into the mix, well, frankly, I am either speechless or soapboxing. There seems little room for anything “in between” these days.

As a result of this madness that makes us feel like we are drowning in sorrow and hatred, there is the added reality of jobs, taxes, entitements, rights, freedoms, all being beaten, bruised or completely extinguished. At every turn we feel frustrated, horrified, confused, tormented, violated, and downtrodden. We must react!

I get it.

Writers find a way to release those emotions, to vent the chaos, to highlight the issues, and lift their pens and pencils in the various causes which call each writer to action. For some, the challenge is an editorial or commentary. For others, they invoke social media and an uprising of action. For still others, there are petitions and bills and amendments, protests and town halls.

Writers are rarely silent on the world around them. We are often the avatars of information.

But I want to highlight one time when it may behoove the writer/author to be still. A long time ago, a very wise older gentleman put a hand on my shoulder and reminded me of something which I carry in my heart today. Over 40 years ago, I was sternly chastised with this warning:

You can’t confuse who you are with what you do.

Okay so some of you are saying, ah that’s not how I heard that saying. There are so many quotes out there about not confusing attitude with personality, desire with destiny and the list goes on. No, this is not that quote.

What this fine gentleman (a military man, a father, a visionary, and a jack-of-all trades) reminded me simply was this: You are a person of particular likes and dislikes. Your job/your work is not to be confused or combined with who you are as an individual. The two are separate and distinct. You do not marry your work, no matter whether it is hobby or profession. At the end of the day you don’t sleep with it or make babies with it, even if the work is something you do 24 hours a day (as in being in the military, being a doctor or a police officer.) Even a mother understands that who she is as a mother and parent is not who she is as a person. And many mothers will tell you they struggled to regain their private self from their mother self! That is the separation I speak about here.

The two entities are entirely separate and should stay that way. (And that is what people forget and one contributing factor why there is added chaos and discord, in my opinion.)

But that isn’t the extent of my warning. As you learn to know yourself and learn to live your life and keep your work from being who you are, you as a writer must learn a greater lesson:

Do not confuse who your characters are with who you are.

This is VERY important. Sometimes we get so caught up in the real chaos that we, as writers and authors forget and let our true feelings bleed over into our characters. If you are writing a memoir about yourself then that may be useful. However, 99% of the time, the vampire, shapeshifter, elf, robot, sweet librarian, or punk rocker won’t have (and can’t begin to fathom) your feelings or your attitudes. And you do your readers a disservice when you lose sight of the warning and forget the lesson. Your stories become preachy, muddied, and confusing. They start being about you and not your characters.

The warning holds true for any profession where you perform a service. Remember that who you are and what you do (writer who writes), are two entirely different and distinct things. Keep them separate. Learn to take yourself out of your reality and put yourself into your character’s reality. If you can’t keep them apart, then you are doing it wrong. No reader wants you to preach or soapbox to them through your characters and use your writing as an excuse to do it. Be mindful of your story and keep to the boundries that you designed. Reality and fiction sometimes meet but never with the heavy-handed chaos that is the full truth.

And how do you insure the separation? You step back and become the character and the reader of your story. You forget you and become them, the people who now live and breath the magic you create. Let them have their life and not yours. Be aware and trust your ability. It doesn’t matter what the reader thinks of you (though we want to be liked). What matters is what the reader thinks of the characters you create. Let the reader love them. And you can be you later.

And that’s my advice for this week. 

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*** Just two weeks to go til Christmas! Take advantage of the sale I have going on for Breaking the Glass Slipper, The Gypsy Thorn and Time and Blood. Check out my Amazon page (and follow me for whenever changes happen). Prices will change in the new year. Also, look for something special coming for Christmas concerning Midnight Assassin!

*** It’s not too late to sign up for the newsletter. Only those who receive the newsletter will receive first dibs on new things, free stories or free books and insights into the next new book coming Summer of 2018.

*** Finally, Drahomira’s birthday is Dec 21, the Winter Solstice. If you don’t know who Drahomira is then you need to catch up with my fiction!). She’s planning a party so watch my Facebook author page for more details.

Until next time, I remain,
Yours Between the Lines,
Sherry

P.S. Don’t forget, every Monday on Instagram is #pinyourpen day! You can follow me and see what pen I put up today (and see past offerings too!) I’m doing this for one year, so catch up!

Author Photographs

By now you know how crazy I am about helping Indie Authors produce books that are at least as professional looking as traditionally published neighbors. What that means is making sure every Indie book doesn’t look homemade or amateurish by comparison. I’ve written about getting professional book covers and professionally formatted interiors as well as investing in a knowledgeable editor.

Yet one item continues to drag down Indie books and I’m here to help you ensure your book does not fall into that trap — the Cheesy Author Photograph.

When someone picks up your book, they examine your cover, read your blurb and then check out your author photo when they read who you are. Assuming your cover design is first rate and your book blurb is sharp and concise, what remains for that first impression is the author picture. And there you are in a grainy, cell phone close up, acting goofy. Your book is a mysterious bit of fantasy and you look like a comic. Epic fail.

You’ve destroyed your image and probably your brand unless you write comedy. So let me give you some tips to be sure your author photo is as professional as the rest of your book.

First, be sure you go professional. Ditch the idea that a quick snapshot taken as a selfie or by your best friend’s roommate will do the trick. You invested good money in a cover, an interior, an editor and so you must now do the same for a photographer. A good author photo will last you for a few years and is the professional image that does a couple things:

• It says you are a professional. You are a business and not a hobby. You want to be taken seriously for your hard work and you have an image/brand that is important.
• A professional photo highlights your good side, showcases your personality and you let your readers see that part of you which they will look for in the books to come.

Next, your author photo highlights your genre, albeit subtly. If your genre is romance, then perhaps you want a photo that is soft and wistful. You could take it outdoors and dress in pastels or even fancy dress if you write historical fiction. If you write mystery, you can sit and stare away as if you see something we cannot. Be serious but not too serious. If you write crime drama, maybe your photo will be black and white and you lean against a lamp post or are catching a taxi. You probably aren’t smiling in this one. Fantasy, be fanciful and maybe in the woods or on the lake, or at a tea party. Whatever you choose, make it fit your genre.

Make it fit your age. If you are older, don’t try to look like you’re 18 again. A good black and white photo can highlight (and disguise) a great deal. Ask your photographer what he/she recommends. Whatever you do, make sure you are act and look natural. Readers want to see people in their authors and not more characters.

Stay away from gimmick shots. I know you love the sex aspect – -and yes, sex sells books. But not for your author photo! Unless, of course, you write erotica and porn, then maybe you want your author photo to show you in your nightgown. Or not. Let’s go with not. Anyway, don’t get your picture in the bed or in the bath or hanging upside down in the garage. If you write sports or fitness, by all means go to the gym or get a shot in your sport. But don’t do it just for shock and awe or “because you want to be different.” That kind of different doesn’t look professional and silly is a hard brand to lose once it is applied.

So get a photographer that is experienced in author head shots. HEAD SHOTS. Yes, sure you can have your picture taken in the cemetery on a tombstone if you write urban fantasy about vampires or beasts. Heck it worked for Rob Thurman. But you aren’t her. Sure you can take your photos with your dogs and horses. It worked for Carolyn Haines. She’s best-selling. But again, you aren’t her and maybe you should worry about something more established until you have her success.

Your photographer can tell you what he/she recommends for you. Because of your age or your coloring. I will warn you against dressing in black and white. Unless you plan to shoot in black and white and then check with your photographer. I was told that gray works better.

Here’s a good shot and it’s me!

Spend money for a good photograph. And no, it won’t cost you like your cover, formatting, and editor will. I got a great deal for less than $100. And I got 10 various shots in color and black and white. Standard prices run from the low end like mine to around $200. Check references and go look at photos taken in the past. Find a photographer who “gets” you. 

And here’s a fun BAD shot, a selfie of me screwing around

Don’t be afraid to show some personality but remember, saying “cheese” doesn’t mean you have to be cheesy about it. Skip the urge to selfie. Remember, one day this picture could be the shot heard – or seen – around the world. Imagine — the magazine shows a photograph of you, the serious, best-selling, professional author. Think on that and smile for the camera.

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My new book is scheduled for release on Oct 31. Get ready! Read The Gypsy Thorn while you wait and please leave me a review. I thank you!

Thanks for stopping by,
I remain, Yours Between the Lines,
Sherry