I find myself alone at the end of a five day, self-imposed retreat and I’m feeling a need to share the revelations from my ruminations. My husband went to a 50-year high school reunion and I stayed behind to work the home stretch of my current book-in-progress. While he’s been away, I’ve noticed I’ve passed through various stages of “being,” as a person and as a writer. The writer in me is interested in both and I wanted to share some of my discoveries about writing and myself (something I rarely do).

I should preface by saying I’m happily married and have been for nearly 29 years. I don’t like it when hubby and I are separated for too long (more on this coming). I must also tell you that the book I’m working on has put me through the wringer and I have been my best and worst friend because of it. Knowing those two issues will help to understand my revelations.

I know how I am, so I prepared for be alone. That means I planned what I wanted to do and how I wanted to do it. I’m a past Girl Scout and a retired military member, not to mention an Aries, so planning and organizing is deeply ingrained in my nature. Be prepared! So I was.

One must have plenty of coffee, tea, sweetener, milk, cheese, and the biggie — chocolate! I did not want to have to go out and shop for the basic necessities. Then I prepared meals in advance too and this time (versus previous days I had alone) I planned not to cook. I ordered overly stuffed and delicious sandwiches from a favorite shop, one for Friday through today. Whatever else I needed I could toss together, ie., a scrambled egg, some toast, a salad. Add a bottle of wine (or two), Bloody Mary mix and good vodka (always available) and check and check. Such preparations require you know yourself well with realistic limits.

Domestic things next. Laundry done. Sheets changed and washed. Towels clean and refreshed. Areas that needed cleaning, cleaned. Me clean. Check and check.

Important writer items, printer ink and paper. Check and check. I am a slave to paper copies. I save to the cloud and flash drives and DVDs too but the paper copies are my friends. I’ve lost too many computers and broken too many flash drives not to be a copy fiend. So check and check.

When last Thursday rolled around and I was alone, the work began. And work I did. Tempted as I was to take advantage of a silent house and steal much wanted long hours of uninterrupted sleep, I didn’t. Instead I rose early (always before 7), ate (read: consumed two cups of coffee) and went to work (by 8:30). Some hours were better than others. All hours were productive. Break for an hour at lunch. Break at 4pm til either 7pm or later, depending. I had a book I was reading too.

I stopped long enough to have a tea party with some wonderful young girls on Thursday (before I really dove deep into my work) who allowed me to tap into my younger self through pure enjoyment of my friend’s children. It’s good to remember innocence and simply joy.

And I took another break on Saturday for a delightful phone call with a long distance friend whose friendship developed from first meeting online. She brightened my heart and shared laughter is fuel for the spirit and salve for the soul. 

I also paused to see the Warriors win the NBA title and Justify capture the Triple Crown. It is important to be there when history is being written. Those moments are never wasted, even if you can’t be there live. After all, you always need experienced fodder for the stories you write.

The rest of these five days (my last one is today as hubby is expected around 5pm), I’ve discovered how I have changed. When I was first alone it was a party. Eat, sleep, snack, shower all when I wanted. Slept like a baby that first night alone.

Second day/night. Productive. Feeling excited about my accomplishments. Slept well but woke anxious to get started the third day.

Third day feeling a little less motivated. Filled the bird feeder. Washed my recent dishes. Wanted to watch a movie and drink some tea. Instead, read a book for an hour, drank my mug of tea and went back to work after my phone call because my mood was significantly lighter. Didn’t sleep as well Saturday night. Mind was on the book and I missed my love.

Sunday brings the NASCAR race. I rose early, got the paper, drank my coffee and was at work by 9. The race came on at 2pm and I worked through their rain delay and still never really watched what little there was of it. I felt distracted despite not watching the TV. Decided later that night to watch a movie because I needed to put aside my work and give my brain a break. Besides my eyes were tired from the computer glare. Felt guilty not working. 

Slept badly last night. But today I’ve been energized again and hubby will be home tonight. I’m anxious to hear his stories about the reunion and the family he visited. I’m anxious to hold him and remember the feel of him and the sound of his voice. I missed him.

All in all, during this absence, I’ve realized that I am focused and motivated but I am influenced by my emotional attachments. I function my best when I connect with the people I care about and not operate completely in a vacuum. Yes, I need silence (or certain kinds of music) on my schedule. I don’t like noise that isn’t mine and I don’t like to be interrupted when I’m in the middle of my work. I alternate between ravenous and “who needs food?” And most of all I like how I am and what I do.

I also realized after spending so much time alone that I am a good friend to myself. I think part of that comes because I’m older and I know I need to be my best friend. But more than that, I don’t have a problem amusing myself. Sure I may get lonely but being alone isn’t a problem. The difference isn’t about other people, but in me. I guess I never thought that much about it before now.

So, I’m still hard at work in this the last full day of my self-made retreat. I’m going to be useless Tuesday as I plan to spend some quality time with hubby. Then Wednesday  I will be back in my office, door closed, mug of tea by my side and printer and laptop whirring as I write. After all, I need privacy while I kill off a darling and then I want to have dinner with hubby.

Find time to do some ruminating of your own. The self-revelations are necessary, even if you believe you have nothing new to learn about yourself, I think you might be wonderfully surprised. Oh and don’t feel guilty about taking a break or reading a book. Go on outside, drink some sunshine or moonlight and count yourself lucky.

Thanks again for stopping by.
I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

Lost Gems of Character Development

We writers and authors spend an exhaustive amount of time learning our craft. You have to do it. There are so many technical aspects about writing which must be studied. You must learn about plots, scene and sequel creation, dialogue, monologues, internal dialogue, Point of View (POV), deep POV, grammar, punctuation, formatting, vocabulary, character arcs, style, genre, trends, world-building. Good grief the list is endless! And there are dozens of checklists, reminders, rule books, handouts, programs, spellcheckers– Holy Info Overload, Batman!

The learning must happen if we want to produce a quality story, chapbook, or novel. I know for me, there is a constant review of certain lessons with every novel, checking style and format, always improving vocabulary, looking to reinvent a master plot or character trope and always striving to be original in the process.

One thing I recently noticed in my writing, and in so many other books, is the missed opportunities for deeper character development. Great care is taken to showcase the golden flecks in someone’s eyes, the blue-black sparkle of hair, the limp, the bushy eyebrows, or the curl of smoke from a pipe. Delicious details offer insights to the vampire’s desires, the streetwalkers boots, the royal throne or the courtier’s waistcoat. Even the most intimate scenes offer description of the silky sheets, the sweat that runs down the chest, the sound of flesh against flesh.

All of these details are ones we’ve been told to add. We know we need to cover all the senses, preferably in every scene. We want the readers to see the people as clearly as we do. To feel and hear the swish of a gown on the stairs, to taste the burning heat of a rye whisky tossed back without thinking, we need the readers to follow us as we dodge around trains who vent steam and blare horns. We go to a picnic and treasure the dappled sunlight, swat the flies over the potato salad and our mouth water when we smell the fried chicken. These details are what flesh out every scene and give depth to our tales. 

What if I told you that you can do more, that you are missing one of the best treasure troves for letting the reader learn about your characters through what THEY find in your stories?

Sometimes deeper character development, and therefore hidden meanings or careful foreshadowing, even character secrets, comes from what isn’t directly said or carefully described. What about what surrounds the character in your story? Are you taking advantage of the character’s personal items that never change, that are personally offered and perhaps never addressed?

Let’s use my house and me as an example for what I mean. In every story, your characters live somewhere, whether its a tent, a mansion, an RV, or a brick and mortar home. In my case, it’s a ranch house. I don’t like stairs anymore because I have a bad knee (have had since I was in my 30’s). This character information which the one story house emphasizes. We’ll mark that as “Fodder.” 

Next, my kitchen. A great many families hang out in the kitchen. Activity thrives there. Look around. Everyone plants their flag, so to speak, in their surroundings. What’s on the counter that never changes? The wall? How about the refrigerator? Fodder! Here’s a pic of my refrig. There are things that never change and others that change with moods. Fodder! Do you see personalities reflected here? Look at the gold magnet or the retro magnet. How about the apron? 

We speak of the roaring fire by the wingchair or the mantle clock. What about the walls? The unchanging, personally decorated walls? Ah, more secrets of likes and dislikes! Look at this picture of my dining room. I have a deep love for Egyptian art. Did you know? You can learn so much from what people hang on the wall for permanent decoration. Secrets to their likes, dislikes or personalities. Let them be noticed.

I know we all enjoy reading about a character in their library. Big old volumes of books, shelves upon shelves, a footstool, a ladder, a cuppa tea and a late night read. But wait! There are nik-nacs, maybe china? Maybe bronze? Let’s look at a portion of my library. Oh my! The oddities abound. Statues and photos and hints galore. Most of these things do not change and reveal so much about me. Do you see the vampires or the dragons? How about the moon or the variety? So much fodder for a tale that reveals personality.

A home also offers insights into hobbies. Do you show a character’s pottery? Artwork? Greenhouse, perhaps? Do you know I like to take photographs? On the spare bedroom wall you find this framed piece, showcasing several photos. Mine. It speaks of some of my deepest loves. More fodder.

There is also a boom in contemporary fiction about professionals like the military, the doctor, the fireman or the cowboy. These people surround themselves with items that represent them or pieces that show something in their past that represents this profession. In my case, there are retirement cases for my husband and me, that showcase our years of military service. These can be the most personal mementos available. Fodder awaits!

Details are the decoration that gives a story depth and richness. Don’t miss out on a chance to provide unique depth to your characters by using the details that may never change. Understand and flesh out the things that make the characters real and you define them in a way that readers will relate to on a deep personal level. Oh look, your reader will say, she puts her daughters drawings on the fridge too. And she uses the magnet of her trip to Boston Harbor to hold it up. You know, the place where she spent her summers so long ago…

Fodder.

These are the lost gems that make the difference between good and great character development. Set your work apart by giving your readers whole characters they can never forget because in the end, the readers want more than anything to be those characters. Make it happen for them.

Thanks for coming by. Let’s make this a great month!
I remain as ever, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry

The Positive of Negative Emotions

…and how to use them for yourself and your characters.

Life is a study of emotions. We often cruise through our days, months and years, barely aware of what’s going on outside of ourselves, perhaps only peripherally aware of our neighbors, too aware of what the news offers, and oblivious to what goes on outside of our scope of interest. I put to you that being more aware of the emotional landscape in your world benefits you personally as well as your character writing — specifically, the negative emotions no one like to feel or discuss.

Authors love to delve into character backgrounds, researching history, culture, even underwear when it suits them (or they have a need to bare it all. Ahem). We will give characters seedy backgrounds, give them physical wounds, and even childhood issues, but few use the darker or more negative emotional wounds/issues to character benefit (unless creating villains). I believe this hurts our characters and handicaps us both as people and as storytellers.

Let me give you a few examples of negative emotions and how each benefits you and your writing when viewed positively.

GUILT:  We all know the dark side of guilt. We do or say something and suddenly we feel bad that we’ve caused harm, or tears. We didn’t mean to break the vase and feel guilty because we know we shouldn’t have been skating in the house. Mom is mad and we are guilty (and punished). So where is the gem here? Guilt proves that we have a conscience. Guilt is the other side of apathy. If we didn’t care, there is no guilt and that’s the true negative. Feeling guilty shows there is a moral compass that can be used over and over for a characters growth. Guilt for past deeds is fodder for actions in the future. Guilt is a foundation for relationships meant to be positive. Guilt is more than a one-and-done happening.

SHAME:  We feel badly when we do something which hurts others when we could have prevented it. We feel badly when we see others mistreated or used by someone else. Shame comes because we have learned what is and isn’t acceptable in speech or behavior or belief. It proves – and here is the positive – that we have a moral compass. Someone you love tells a  lie about someone else and you are ashamed of them. Your moral compass is pinging. It proves that you have learned that certain kinds of pain are wrong. The gift is that in feeling shame, you know how to find relief and pride. Shame can build character. Take a police officer who built a career on  a past shame and is now incorruptible.

ANGER: Being mad is one of those emotions that can be both good and bad. You’ve heard of “justifiable homicide?” Murder when the person had it coming? But what about simpler anger. Anger that is so deep that it ruins relationships. Such anger can test our moral compass, re: homicide. Hot anger seems like the unforgiveable negative but au contraire! Let us not forget Shakespeare’s warning, “Revenge is a dish best served cold.” In other words, let cooler heads prevail and when you have calmed down enact a revenge that the other never saw coming. So what’s the positive of anger? Anger demonstrats what your personal limits are and pushes you to test your moral compass. You reach the edge of your abyss and either you fall in or you step back. For a character to discover that edge gives them a wonderful control of self. And a useful tool against others who seek to manipulate, too. Use anger carefully.

FEAR: We all know about “fight or flight” syndrome and how fear will motivate or paralyze. The negative part of fear is becoming insecure. Fear can still thrust a soldier into battle or paralyze them into being shot. Fear is deadly. The upside to fear is how it creates change. Overcoming fear can break inhibitions or create new ones. Coming to grips with fear also teaches a person to trust personal instincts. And good instincts are a character’s gem. Use fear to make positive change and memorable, useful, experiences.

GRIEF: If you’ve lost a childhood friend, a family pet, a relative or cried over a character in a book or a movie, you’ve known grief. The level of attachment defines the depth. And that depth is the positive aspect we need for greater characters. Without grieving, we are shallow, septic, apathetic and even anti-social. Grief is the obvious truth of caring. Grieving is change, development, growth for relationships, a mantra for change. The mother who lost four children due to miscarriages gives up having any children and stops having sex because of a fear of more losses. The grief has changed her entire outlook of sex, relationships, her abilities and her function in life. And suddenly an abandoned child is thrust into her life and she needs bone marrow….and we have a match. Now the moral fiber opens and so does a heart. Grief can make positive changes when carefully managed.

These are only a few examples of how we need to use the positive side of negative emotions. Using this method to peel away the sour, provides special depth to characters and makes them unforgettable and more like real people. We need to find positives in the negatives for ourselves too, and if we don’t know how, then begin with characters. You’ll find your way by learning through them, just as your readers will.

Happy Writing!

Don’t forget to join me for my next Facebook Live chat on May 26, 11 a.m. on my author page.

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I remain, Yours Between the Lines,

Sherry